The Gloucester Clam’s Tournament of Crappy Intersections: Round 2 continues!

Another day, another faceoff! We’re almost done with round 2, folks. Hooray.

intersections

Maplewood/Prospect/Railroad vs. Pond/Eastern/Witham

In news that will astonish no one, Maplewood/Prospect/Railroad got over 90% of the votes last round over Washington/High. Apparently only like 10 people live in Lanesville and read our blog. Or, the Maplewood/Prospect clusterfuck is really that bad. Spoiler alert: it is that bad. First of all, the random buoy in the middle of the intersection. Why do we do this, Gloucester? Does this mean the general vicinity falls under maritime law? I try not to leave a wake with my Scion, but I guarantee nothing. Next, the backup. Coming from Maplewood, it’s especially onerous, because no one approaching Prospect from Railroad will let you across. This leads people turning right to cut through Shaws, who apparently hated that so much that when they re-did the parking lot, they made it harder to cut through, but people still do, even using one-ways the wrong way to do so. And again, one idiot clogs the intersection, and the whole thing gums up and everyone is stuck there until next week, beeping morosely.

Meanwhile over on the other side of town, there’s the intersection where Witham and Pond meet Eastern Ave. This beat out the Joan of Arc statue fauxrotary by ONE VOTE. Usually one side wins by a huge margin, but dang. Anyway, there’s so many reasons this intersection is not only sucky, but pretty goddamn dangerous: the speed limit is high coming from Nugent Stretch, and people are FLYING. Turning left from Witham onto Eastern has made me stool my panties on more than one occasion. Turning left onto Pond is almost as bad, but at least you after that turn you can console yourself with amazingly-priced secondhand furniture from Second Glance. Either way, this intersection blows.

2 thoughts on “The Gloucester Clam’s Tournament of Crappy Intersections: Round 2 continues!

  1. Maplewood/Prospect/Railroad vs. Pond/Eastern/Witham

    One of these should have been in the west bracket so they did not face-off so early. And everyone is ringing up the derby at the green buoy. But folks, reconsider. While the voting is still open. Are we voting for a little gesticulating screw you as someone does not follow the Gloucester way of allowing all traffic to freely flow like bees around a sweet flower?

    Pond Eastern is the clear winner here. Why? It’s a physics problem. Velocity times mass plus something and you end up with flames, smoke, fire trucks and overtime. That is impossible at the green buoy. Fender bender, max

    When you vote, think of the carnage.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I think I may have been the swing vote for the Pond/Eastern/Witham poll, but in this case, I voted for the buoy clusterfuck. No contest. Agree with Paul re: the potential for carnage at Pond Rd, but having lived in Rockport for a million years AND on Witham St., I’ve never heard of anything major happening there. But at least there are multiple body shops and mechanics within pushing distance, just in case!

    Liked by 1 person

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